My story...
Jun. 5th, 2007 10:07 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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vigorliShattering
Author: obvmluver
LOTR RPS
Pairing: Orlando Bloom, Viggo Mortensen
Summary: A small thing can change everything...
Rating: G-PG.
Warnings: Adult Content, Angst, Drama
Beta'd by: willys_digs
Authors Note: from a recent personal dilemna.
Disclaimer: The events of this story are partially non-fictional, however the character's portrayed in this story are completely fictional. No profit is being made.
One rainy Friday evening.
The call I had been afraid of came at 8:27 PM. Before I get into the detail of that call, I better tell you where this all started.
For years Viggo had suffered from unexplainable loss of balance from time to time. It wasn’t something we thought would be severe. He had low blood pressure and we always thought those two had to be related, until he started losing the feeling of his left leg. First it all pointed to a nerve being under pressure. With good meds for neuralgia, the inevitable pain stayed away and the numbness lessened. We already thought that was it, that we had managed to win that crippling pain and loud cursing it would bring with it.
My God, we were wrong.
The numbness started to rise slowly edging towards his left armpit. My concerns woke immediately. Something had to be terribly wrong with him. We contacted Viggo’s doctor who then contacted the state’s best neurologist. All symptoms pointed to Viggo having something wrong in his neural system up in bulbus area. At that time, I didn’t know what it meant.
This neurologist needed an MRI scan arranged as soon as possible. At that point I was scared shitless. The speed Viggo was taken in for the scan and all made me constantly feel sick. Now, I felt like I was losing my mind. I wasn’t prepared to go through anything like this when we both discovered we wanted to be more than friends.
The results of the scan came quickly and we got the light analysis not long afterwards. In Viggo’s spinal cord slightly to the left, right under the bulbus, was a pea-sized tumor pressuring the important nerves of his entire left side. The reason for his weird symptoms had been found.
The next step we had to take was to talk it through. First we called our closest friends and then to Christine and Henry to let them know what had happened and how we were going to proceed from now on. And then we had to talk, just the two of us.
We went outside into the rain. I searched for his hand and soon he gripped it turning to me and admitted he was scared. Right then I knew I had to be the strong part of the two. It was an overwhelming feeling since Viggo had always been supporting me in everything. All I could do was nod and say it was only human to be scared and that we were going to pull through no matter how impossible it seemed.
There were many possibilities what might happen. Viggo might pull through the surgery with flying colours, the tumor being benign. Or he could pull through the surgery well but the tumor could be malignant and he’d need chemotherapy and cytostatics. Or then he could be paralysed forever or he could die. No one could tell what the chances were to survive as the winner. Silently we had to prepare for the worst no matter how much we needed to keep the champion atmosphere on.
We both grew silent then and it didn’t take long for the hiccupping sobs starting to fall from his lips. I enveloped him into my arms and kept whispering soothing words in his ear. It was the first time I had seen a grown man break down into an uncontrollable cry. Of course we both knew the tumor was not Viggo’s fault in any way and that he could do nothing to make it go away. But still, a pea-sized little thing was able to stop the world turning.
To go through everything was both physically and emotionally draining. It sucked most of the energy out of Viggo.
Slowly the pouring rain started to feel cold as it reached our skin through our clothes. Viggo being exhausted started shivering. I escorted him back into the warm house to rid him of the soaked clothes, dry him up and change him into a fresh pair of boxers. I knew he could have done all that himself, but on my insistence he let me do the work.
I did much the same to myself after I had gotten Viggo under the covers. Then I took my place beside him on the bed and pushed myself up on my side. I ran my fingertips along his temple and hair looking deep in his eyes. He had stopped crying, but fear was evident in his blue eyes. He then took my hand in his gently and kissed my knuckles. I offered him a weak smile and encouraged him to close his eyes and get some sleep.
I watched him fall asleep, the wrinkles and lines on his face soften before I got up and slowly walked out of the bedroom. I carefully closed the door and leaned against it. That’s when I fell to my knees and let myself shatter into a million little pieces.
Author: obvmluver
LOTR RPS
Pairing: Orlando Bloom, Viggo Mortensen
Summary: A small thing can change everything...
Rating: G-PG.
Warnings: Adult Content, Angst, Drama
Beta'd by: willys_digs
Authors Note: from a recent personal dilemna.
Disclaimer: The events of this story are partially non-fictional, however the character's portrayed in this story are completely fictional. No profit is being made.
One rainy Friday evening.
The call I had been afraid of came at 8:27 PM. Before I get into the detail of that call, I better tell you where this all started.
For years Viggo had suffered from unexplainable loss of balance from time to time. It wasn’t something we thought would be severe. He had low blood pressure and we always thought those two had to be related, until he started losing the feeling of his left leg. First it all pointed to a nerve being under pressure. With good meds for neuralgia, the inevitable pain stayed away and the numbness lessened. We already thought that was it, that we had managed to win that crippling pain and loud cursing it would bring with it.
My God, we were wrong.
The numbness started to rise slowly edging towards his left armpit. My concerns woke immediately. Something had to be terribly wrong with him. We contacted Viggo’s doctor who then contacted the state’s best neurologist. All symptoms pointed to Viggo having something wrong in his neural system up in bulbus area. At that time, I didn’t know what it meant.
This neurologist needed an MRI scan arranged as soon as possible. At that point I was scared shitless. The speed Viggo was taken in for the scan and all made me constantly feel sick. Now, I felt like I was losing my mind. I wasn’t prepared to go through anything like this when we both discovered we wanted to be more than friends.
The results of the scan came quickly and we got the light analysis not long afterwards. In Viggo’s spinal cord slightly to the left, right under the bulbus, was a pea-sized tumor pressuring the important nerves of his entire left side. The reason for his weird symptoms had been found.
The next step we had to take was to talk it through. First we called our closest friends and then to Christine and Henry to let them know what had happened and how we were going to proceed from now on. And then we had to talk, just the two of us.
We went outside into the rain. I searched for his hand and soon he gripped it turning to me and admitted he was scared. Right then I knew I had to be the strong part of the two. It was an overwhelming feeling since Viggo had always been supporting me in everything. All I could do was nod and say it was only human to be scared and that we were going to pull through no matter how impossible it seemed.
There were many possibilities what might happen. Viggo might pull through the surgery with flying colours, the tumor being benign. Or he could pull through the surgery well but the tumor could be malignant and he’d need chemotherapy and cytostatics. Or then he could be paralysed forever or he could die. No one could tell what the chances were to survive as the winner. Silently we had to prepare for the worst no matter how much we needed to keep the champion atmosphere on.
We both grew silent then and it didn’t take long for the hiccupping sobs starting to fall from his lips. I enveloped him into my arms and kept whispering soothing words in his ear. It was the first time I had seen a grown man break down into an uncontrollable cry. Of course we both knew the tumor was not Viggo’s fault in any way and that he could do nothing to make it go away. But still, a pea-sized little thing was able to stop the world turning.
To go through everything was both physically and emotionally draining. It sucked most of the energy out of Viggo.
Slowly the pouring rain started to feel cold as it reached our skin through our clothes. Viggo being exhausted started shivering. I escorted him back into the warm house to rid him of the soaked clothes, dry him up and change him into a fresh pair of boxers. I knew he could have done all that himself, but on my insistence he let me do the work.
I did much the same to myself after I had gotten Viggo under the covers. Then I took my place beside him on the bed and pushed myself up on my side. I ran my fingertips along his temple and hair looking deep in his eyes. He had stopped crying, but fear was evident in his blue eyes. He then took my hand in his gently and kissed my knuckles. I offered him a weak smile and encouraged him to close his eyes and get some sleep.
I watched him fall asleep, the wrinkles and lines on his face soften before I got up and slowly walked out of the bedroom. I carefully closed the door and leaned against it. That’s when I fell to my knees and let myself shatter into a million little pieces.
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Date: 2007-06-05 10:12 pm (UTC)I'm sorry that this is based on personal experience. I, too, hope all is well.